by matt low
A horribly hideous witch walks the streets with a certain audacity in broad daylight. What ancient evil tortures does she have in store for the mere mortals she is sure to encounter any second now? What’s this? Men seem to be smitten by this creature fashioned by Satan himself. Each looks longingly at her as she passes.
Ah – what diabolical brilliance! She has most certainly conjured a spell that affects the male gender of our species, drawing them foolishly to her. They follow at all costs – no doubt to their certain death once she leads them like sheep to her evil lair with fiendish delight. She smiles at the ease of it all.
Wait, there’s nothing metaphysical about her at all. She’s just an ugly lady who rubbed cashews all over herself. Thanks, Planters.
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